I have five biological sisters and many other sisters. When I say biological, I mean just that! We are linked via DNA whether it paternal or maternal . . we are biological sisters. I don't play those half sibling games. My many other sisters range from sister-in-laws, best friends, wassup sister, etc. What's important to recognize is the fact that we are all sisters and we MUST by all means identify ourselves as My Sister's Keeper. When one of us fall, we all fall in some form or fashion. It does not matter if you are biologically linked or you're "play sisters", the fact of the matter remains that we must support one another.
I am the oldest on both my mother and father's side of my siblings. I was raised by my mother and lets just say I was the oldest so what I said always was the way it was when mama wasn't around. I made sure things were in order and I also made sure we all had fun when weren't suppose to . .LOL! I recall us playing "Chile" and "Going to Work". If you are from the South you know that "Chile" means "gossiping" with your girlfriends. "Going to Work" was just that . .we pretended we were going to work! Through the years we've had our ups and downs just like other families, but at the end of the day you will not mess with my sisters. I mean I am My Sister's Keeper.
I have sisters who are not my biological sisters and we connect in the soul. If I am feeling a certain way and vice versa it will show through. It permeates through the soul for both of use in whatever the connection may be! Those sisters reach out to me, as I do to them. It could be a kind word, a prayer, thought, etc. You will NOT rest until you do exactly what your soul has been telling you to do when you connect with your "sister". Advice to you . . just do what you're told . .hahaha! No one is 100% all the time and when we are open to receiving guidance from each other we can continually build one another. A book I continue to read is "Friendship is a Blessing" and it's an Inspirational Reflections on Friendship book. One of the quotes by Alarie Tennille, "Women don't just have friends. We have soulmates. . .and that is powerful compensation for life's other hardships." This goes for sisters as well . . no matter who they are. Everyone has a story. It may not be your exact story, but we all have one. I am My Sister's Keeper.
An organization of sisterhood I absolutely love is Delta Sigma Theta. I have the honor of relaying that one of my best childhood friends, R. W. is DST and the sisterhood bond I have been privileged to be a part of outside of the organization has been wonderful. I love that the bond is oh so strong no matter where you go and recognize DST sisters. The events are supportive of everyone and the community service aspect is amazing. That's how it should be between us as "sisters" in our everyday lives. Build up each other vs tearing each other down. Console each other in time of need vs talking about each other to people who really don't give a damn, but just want to know the scoop. Believe in them vs tearing down a dream. Love each other for who we are vs loving superficially. I am My Sister's Keeper.
Just know that nothing in life is guaranteed other than death. Live your life to the fullest. Respect yourself and everyone you encounter. I am My Sister's Keeper!
#findyourhappy
LR Wilson, Founder
Follow on IG: @channelingtequila
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
FB: Channeling Tequila
Friday, January 26, 2018
Friday, January 19, 2018
Bent . . Not Broken!
In life we go through a lot of things. From the time we enter into this world our destiny has already been defined. Trials and tribulations will come and in order to persevere we need to be resilient. Broken relationships, job loss, birth, death, life tossing you all around just to get a reaction out of you. I've had my share of all those things and I am still standing. BENT . . NOT BROKEN! In the last two years I think I cried enough for the entire universe to be set free from anything they may have been going through. The difference is unless you were in my INNER CIRCLE you would never have a clue of what I was battling every single day. . .DEPRESSION! YES THE DREADED "D" word in the black community or hell any community of brown!
I'm not sure who this is geared towards . .and I definitely didn't think this would be the direction of this blog title . .but HERE IT IS! So receive it . .share it . .
Now back to BENT. . .NOT BROKEN! I was working everyday, not one but two jobs, maintaining the household to the best of my depressed ability . .on a continual wheel like I was a hamster running. Day in and day out . .it was literally like the movie Groundhog Day (there's a plug for that). I would do all that tiring work of appearing normal, cry in the bathroom, cry in the car, cry in my office, cry walking to the damn bathroom to clean my face, get home, cook dinner for my kids . .well maybe . .but they ate, cry while cooking, cry on my way to my bed, get in my bed, cry myself to sleep. So when I say I cried enough tears for the entire universe . . it was REAL! I didn't even know I was depressed, I just thought I was going through the motion of a relationship that was ending.
I don't know what type of relationship some of you ladies have with your gyno; however my gyno is like THE BOMB! It's literally like being at a hair salon . .lol! The day I walked in for this appointment was very different. As soon as she walked into the room she took one look at me and said, "Hey let me ask you some questions!" Me being the chipper person I am and the pretend person I tried to portray to her was like "Oh ok". She asked me 5 questions . . and then said "YOU'RE DEPRESSED". My damn gyno people . . no one else . . the damn gyno! What did I do when she said that? Yep . . cried! Hell I'm crying now thinking about it! She took me into her arms and held me, gave me a prescription for this MAGICAL PILL CALLED TRAZADONE and said go see a therapist. She then followed up with, "I will be calling you on Monday to see when your appointment is with the therapist." AND . . she did just that!! Even threatened me that if I didn't go she would be reporting me!! I was like WTH!!?? But hey, it was the BEST THING EVER for me. I was BENT . . .NOT BROKEN!
As a female, I'm sure males do too, but I can only speak for MY GENDER; we go through a lot of emotional trauma because we give our entire existence as it relates to emotions. Everything we do is attached to an emotional response. We love . .emotion. We argue . .emotion. We encourage . .emotion. We are a bag of emotion! Once that emotion is turned off or lying dormant, you can bet that there's a problem! It just may be depression! Here's a handy dandy link for you or someone
https://www.drugs.com/cg/depression.html to assist you . .or someone 😉!
I was really down and out for the count. I was BENT. . .NOT BROKEN but I didn't know it. I for sure thought life was over as I saw it. Well ladies and gents I'm here to tell you IT WAS NOT!! After months and months of the MAGICAL PILL, continued therapy and STOP. . . LOTS OF PRAYER, I woke up one day and started living life again. It was indeed a new awakening! I was so BENT my spine curved . .NOT BROKEN! I pulled it together slowly and surely. Started actually leaving the house again for more than just work. Looked at myself and was like FK THIS . .I GOTTA PULL IT TOGETHER! I mean I pride myself on being STRONG and LOVING MYSELF more than anyone could ever love me, yet I had not embraced that in damn near two years!! IT WAS TIME! YES IT WAS TIME! I looked good on the outside . .but the inside was ALL JACKED UP!! Once I realized that I was BENT . . .NOT BROKEN it was ON AND POPPIN!!
The one thing that I NEVER compromised during this time was my CASHFLOW!! UM HELL TO THE NO! I still had responsibilities and life needed to go on!! All I could see was the scene from Color Purple when Sophia told Celie "You better bash Mr. in his head and think about heaven later." That was me with my depression and my cashflow! YOU WILL NOT BREAK MY CASHFLOW! BENT . . .NOT BROKEN!
The best advice I can give anyone going though life's trials is to SEEK HELP if needed. There is no shame in taking care of yourself mentally. LOVE YOU . . EMBRACE YOU . .be BENT . . .NOT BROKEN!
With Love
LR Wilson, Founder
#findyourhappy
IG: @channelingtequila
FB: Channeling Tequila
Email: www.channelingtequila@gmail.com
I'm not sure who this is geared towards . .and I definitely didn't think this would be the direction of this blog title . .but HERE IT IS! So receive it . .share it . .
Now back to BENT. . .NOT BROKEN! I was working everyday, not one but two jobs, maintaining the household to the best of my depressed ability . .on a continual wheel like I was a hamster running. Day in and day out . .it was literally like the movie Groundhog Day (there's a plug for that). I would do all that tiring work of appearing normal, cry in the bathroom, cry in the car, cry in my office, cry walking to the damn bathroom to clean my face, get home, cook dinner for my kids . .well maybe . .but they ate, cry while cooking, cry on my way to my bed, get in my bed, cry myself to sleep. So when I say I cried enough tears for the entire universe . . it was REAL! I didn't even know I was depressed, I just thought I was going through the motion of a relationship that was ending.
I don't know what type of relationship some of you ladies have with your gyno; however my gyno is like THE BOMB! It's literally like being at a hair salon . .lol! The day I walked in for this appointment was very different. As soon as she walked into the room she took one look at me and said, "Hey let me ask you some questions!" Me being the chipper person I am and the pretend person I tried to portray to her was like "Oh ok". She asked me 5 questions . . and then said "YOU'RE DEPRESSED". My damn gyno people . . no one else . . the damn gyno! What did I do when she said that? Yep . . cried! Hell I'm crying now thinking about it! She took me into her arms and held me, gave me a prescription for this MAGICAL PILL CALLED TRAZADONE and said go see a therapist. She then followed up with, "I will be calling you on Monday to see when your appointment is with the therapist." AND . . she did just that!! Even threatened me that if I didn't go she would be reporting me!! I was like WTH!!?? But hey, it was the BEST THING EVER for me. I was BENT . . .NOT BROKEN!
As a female, I'm sure males do too, but I can only speak for MY GENDER; we go through a lot of emotional trauma because we give our entire existence as it relates to emotions. Everything we do is attached to an emotional response. We love . .emotion. We argue . .emotion. We encourage . .emotion. We are a bag of emotion! Once that emotion is turned off or lying dormant, you can bet that there's a problem! It just may be depression! Here's a handy dandy link for you or someone
https://www.drugs.com/cg/depression.html to assist you . .or someone 😉!
I was really down and out for the count. I was BENT. . .NOT BROKEN but I didn't know it. I for sure thought life was over as I saw it. Well ladies and gents I'm here to tell you IT WAS NOT!! After months and months of the MAGICAL PILL, continued therapy and STOP. . . LOTS OF PRAYER, I woke up one day and started living life again. It was indeed a new awakening! I was so BENT my spine curved . .NOT BROKEN! I pulled it together slowly and surely. Started actually leaving the house again for more than just work. Looked at myself and was like FK THIS . .I GOTTA PULL IT TOGETHER! I mean I pride myself on being STRONG and LOVING MYSELF more than anyone could ever love me, yet I had not embraced that in damn near two years!! IT WAS TIME! YES IT WAS TIME! I looked good on the outside . .but the inside was ALL JACKED UP!! Once I realized that I was BENT . . .NOT BROKEN it was ON AND POPPIN!!
The one thing that I NEVER compromised during this time was my CASHFLOW!! UM HELL TO THE NO! I still had responsibilities and life needed to go on!! All I could see was the scene from Color Purple when Sophia told Celie "You better bash Mr. in his head and think about heaven later." That was me with my depression and my cashflow! YOU WILL NOT BREAK MY CASHFLOW! BENT . . .NOT BROKEN!
The best advice I can give anyone going though life's trials is to SEEK HELP if needed. There is no shame in taking care of yourself mentally. LOVE YOU . . EMBRACE YOU . .be BENT . . .NOT BROKEN!
With Love
LR Wilson, Founder
#findyourhappy
IG: @channelingtequila
FB: Channeling Tequila
Email: www.channelingtequila@gmail.com
Friday, January 12, 2018
RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH!
RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH! RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH!! I remember the days when I was a cheerleader in high school!! Yes . .I was an actual cheerleader. I know it's hard to believe but all this SHINY STAR ATTITUDE has been around for quite some time!! What I remember MOST of all is when I almost WASN'T a cheerleader! YES!! IKR . . who would deny ME from cheering people on!!?? Well let me just tell you . . my Jr High cheerleading coach/PE teacher. I will keep her name out of this so no one has hard feelings lol! See what had happen was . . I was BAD AS HELL and was always fighting. Didn't even care . . fought girls, boys, families . .literally did NOT care! I wanted to try out for cheerleading and she said that if I didn't act like a lady, stop fighting and clean my act up she would NOT ALLOW ME . .YES ME . .to try out! LAWDDDD you talk about some decision making that needed to happen . . HAHAHA!
I never was one to start a fight; however I had NO PROBLEM ending it! My mom was so tired of coming up to the school for this or that. My mouth though? Now that was yet a different story. I did NOT stand for any injustices..even back then! GO FIGURE I am now a Probation Officer . .LOL! No one saw this one coming I'm sure 😜😉! I would call out teachers, students, hell even the principal. My mom would say "Why can't you just be quiet, sit down and do your work?" I mean . .that sounded ideal for someone without my mouth . . but hey God gave me this mouth for a reason. She was NOT trying to hear all that. I don't care how many whoopings I got . .punishments didn't even matter; hell I still did what I wanted to do! I mean a whooping would end eventually . .by the time she caught me anyway I was so out of breath I didn't even care anymore. Just get it over with. With a punishment . .all my friends knew I would be on punishment after each encounter so I mean I never missed out on anything because we would just postpone any fun arrangements LOL!
RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH! Looking back as I am now older and wiser . .that cheerleading coach was cheering for me. My mom was cheering for me. My friends were cheering for me. I was cheering for me and didn't even know it! The people that have your back continuously through thick and thin are the ones that are cheering for us! They are cheering for us so that we can meet our full potential and beyond!!
What I am about to say may come as a surprise to many of you; so let's just rip that band aid off! Brace yourself for the sting of hair follicles being stripped from your core because here it is . . .everybody cheering is not cheering FOR YOU but AGAINST YOU! Everybody you THOUGHT would catch you when you did that scissor flip in the air moved a little to the left because seeing you face plant the pavement was a bit more satisfying to them than catching you in the basket below. Now I was always a base because let's face it . .no human basket can hold all this right here . .not even back then! STOP . .WE DIGRESSED . .let's move forward . .LOL! As I was saying, there will be those who you THOUGHT would have your back but they don't and/or didn't when you needed them the most. It could be family, friends, co-workers, supervisors . .I mean anyone you placed your faith in to CHEER YOU ON and they didn't like you thought they should or would was quite frankly cheering against you. Now listen, sometimes we need to be cheered AGAINST because we are just out there foul and need some REAL direction. What I am talking about is cheering against your SUCCESS. That's the real issue here!
We have to make sure that when we are striving to do better and be better, we have cheerleaders in our corner cheering us ON TO VICTORY! Standing by us in hard times and being there for us when/if we face plant on our own. NOT CAUSING us to face plant. I can only speak for myself when I say I spend a lot of time trying to right my wrongs and to do what's right IN SPITE OF what people say, think or feel because at the end of the day I am MY OWN cheerleader and I know that I will NEVER NOT HAVE MY OWN BACK! We can not allow other people to be in charge of our happiness. They will fail us EVERY SINGLE TIME! Even if we don't KNOW exactly what OUR HAPPY is, we do have an inkling that we are not acknowledging. GO BACK . .MAKE A LIST . .TAKE ACTION! RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH YOURSELF!! One of my all time favorite songs is ENCOURAGE YOURSELF by Donald Lawrence and the TriCity Singers. Here's a link . .https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbEaftzaFWA
Whenever you are down in your feelings, down in your happy . .JUST KNOW THAT you are your #1 CHEERLEADER!! If you're not on the field or the court . . NOTHING ELSE MATTERS! RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH!! #findyourhappy
With Love
LR Wilson, Founder
www.channelingtequila.blogspot.com
FB: Channeling Tequila
IG: @channelingtequila
Follow on GOOGLE+
LIKE/SHARE/FOLLOW
I never was one to start a fight; however I had NO PROBLEM ending it! My mom was so tired of coming up to the school for this or that. My mouth though? Now that was yet a different story. I did NOT stand for any injustices..even back then! GO FIGURE I am now a Probation Officer . .LOL! No one saw this one coming I'm sure 😜😉! I would call out teachers, students, hell even the principal. My mom would say "Why can't you just be quiet, sit down and do your work?" I mean . .that sounded ideal for someone without my mouth . . but hey God gave me this mouth for a reason. She was NOT trying to hear all that. I don't care how many whoopings I got . .punishments didn't even matter; hell I still did what I wanted to do! I mean a whooping would end eventually . .by the time she caught me anyway I was so out of breath I didn't even care anymore. Just get it over with. With a punishment . .all my friends knew I would be on punishment after each encounter so I mean I never missed out on anything because we would just postpone any fun arrangements LOL!
RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH! Looking back as I am now older and wiser . .that cheerleading coach was cheering for me. My mom was cheering for me. My friends were cheering for me. I was cheering for me and didn't even know it! The people that have your back continuously through thick and thin are the ones that are cheering for us! They are cheering for us so that we can meet our full potential and beyond!!
What I am about to say may come as a surprise to many of you; so let's just rip that band aid off! Brace yourself for the sting of hair follicles being stripped from your core because here it is . . .everybody cheering is not cheering FOR YOU but AGAINST YOU! Everybody you THOUGHT would catch you when you did that scissor flip in the air moved a little to the left because seeing you face plant the pavement was a bit more satisfying to them than catching you in the basket below. Now I was always a base because let's face it . .no human basket can hold all this right here . .not even back then! STOP . .WE DIGRESSED . .let's move forward . .LOL! As I was saying, there will be those who you THOUGHT would have your back but they don't and/or didn't when you needed them the most. It could be family, friends, co-workers, supervisors . .I mean anyone you placed your faith in to CHEER YOU ON and they didn't like you thought they should or would was quite frankly cheering against you. Now listen, sometimes we need to be cheered AGAINST because we are just out there foul and need some REAL direction. What I am talking about is cheering against your SUCCESS. That's the real issue here!
We have to make sure that when we are striving to do better and be better, we have cheerleaders in our corner cheering us ON TO VICTORY! Standing by us in hard times and being there for us when/if we face plant on our own. NOT CAUSING us to face plant. I can only speak for myself when I say I spend a lot of time trying to right my wrongs and to do what's right IN SPITE OF what people say, think or feel because at the end of the day I am MY OWN cheerleader and I know that I will NEVER NOT HAVE MY OWN BACK! We can not allow other people to be in charge of our happiness. They will fail us EVERY SINGLE TIME! Even if we don't KNOW exactly what OUR HAPPY is, we do have an inkling that we are not acknowledging. GO BACK . .MAKE A LIST . .TAKE ACTION! RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH YOURSELF!! One of my all time favorite songs is ENCOURAGE YOURSELF by Donald Lawrence and the TriCity Singers. Here's a link . .https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbEaftzaFWA
Whenever you are down in your feelings, down in your happy . .JUST KNOW THAT you are your #1 CHEERLEADER!! If you're not on the field or the court . . NOTHING ELSE MATTERS! RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH!! #findyourhappy
With Love
LR Wilson, Founder
www.channelingtequila.blogspot.com
FB: Channeling Tequila
IG: @channelingtequila
Follow on GOOGLE+
LIKE/SHARE/FOLLOW
Friday, January 5, 2018
Claiming My Time!
YESSSSS 2018 is full swing!!! This year has been deemed "secure the bag" year!! What will be in your bag? Is it a relationship? Is it health? Is it finances? Is it happiness? You MUST define what is in your bag to secure so that you can CLAIM YOUR TIME!! If you've been waiting to do something and haven't quite gotten there yet . . for whatever reason - that's YOUR business; now is the time! SECURE THE BAG!
I am securing finances this year. Just about EVERY year I transform my credit, pay off bills, dispute things on my credit report that continue to reappear every time the current collection agency sells the account to a new collection agency. YES THAT VISCIOUS CYCLE! It seems like no matter what I do and every time I am "getting ahead" there is always something that holds me back from doing what I need to do. I mean I wanna, yea "wanna" . . not "want to" be in that magic number! And(grammatically incorrect), but hey . .it's my blog (LOL); I ain't talking about that magic number in the gospel song to go up first in the second coming. I'm talking about that GOOD CREDIT MAGIC NUMBER!! I am tired of swaying and NOT getting there!! It's like I'm the damn working upper MIDDLE class poor!! I mean my day job is a government one so I would rather get those wonderful tax cuts that the rich have access to . .have GREAT credit and live the best life they are living; however I am paid in GRATITUDE for my job and I can recognize my own face in the mirror at the end of the day!
Growing up I was taught to work for what you want because nothing is free! Yea . .GREAT CONCEPT; however I was not taught about credit or to save for a rainy day. Hell I made it . .I spent it! Yes I paid bills . . .which by the way took me quite some time to grasp; but I conquered it! Anything that was left after paying bills was a FREE FOR ALL in my mind! YEA . . NO! I never even thought about saving anything for an "emergency" until my husband talked about saving and we argued FOR YEARS, yes YEARS about making sure we had something saved because you never know what might happen. I tried to tell y'all that I made it . .I spent it. Still I struggled over and over again with that concept.
Credit? What is credit? Hell what even does my social security number have to do with credit? My mama said don't give that number out. Now she never did say why? You know you just do whatever your mama, grandmother or whomever the approved matriarch of the family is! Like you don't question anything when you're from the South. It's oh ok . .hell she said it . .it must be right! Then I learned this magical thing . . .OH SNAP . . I can get a credit card to buy anything I want!!!??? Now they failed to tell me about the part where I had to pay it back. Explain what an interest rate was. Explain all the "fees" associated with this magical card. OH and most importantly if I didn't pay it back or it was late . . the balance would damn near double from what I even spent!! YES so crash course on CREDIT . .if you don't have the cash for it . .don't get it!! Again . .that took YEARS for me to learn. I filed Chapter 7 bankruptcy and got a brand new start!! It was so new that I got even more credit cards!! You would think . .ok you got out of this just like you prayed for God to do for you . .annnnnnddddd yea you tried it again! But see this time I had a better handle on things and I understood what I needed to do. NOT! Remember in the beginning I said that finances was in my bag to secure . . yea so years later that's still the case! I mean my credit is better (wink wink) but I am NOT in the magic number!! I want to be in the MAGIC NUMBER!! I am CLAIMING MY TIME!!
I work too hard in MANY jobs in order to live MY BEST DAMN LIFE finally and I am CLAIMING MY TIME!! 2018 is MY TIME!! It wasn't until my marriage dissipated that I LEARNED to save for an emergency and to juggle everything on my own. I was forced to learn and I mastered that whole moving from two incomes to one income and maintaining the lifestyle I am accustomed to!! Hell I needed my Caribou! My friends that know me actually gave me money for Caribou!! YES I LOVE YOU LADIES!!! Yennafer Jttrevold, Carcia Mooper, Bmy Arthles, Nenny Pelson. Names have been changed to protect identities . .LOL! I mean I am accustomed to the debt I have acquired!!
I asked earlier WHAT IS IN YOUR BAG? You have to figure that out so that you too are able to SECURE IT! I am CLAIMING MY TIME and YOU ARE TOO!! Don't over pack your bag and have realistic expectations. If it's financial, unless you come into some NICE MONEY . .don't forget about me . . you are not going to be able to secure your bag financially in one swoop. There's a process so take your time and do what's necessary. All I ask is that you send checks directly to my debtors. I don't even need the cash . .that's how serious I am about CLAIMING MY TIME!! Whatever is in your bag . . .2018 is the year of CLAIMING MY TIME!!
Be Blessed!
LR Wilson, Founder
IG: @channelingtequila
FB: Channing Tequila
Follow on Google+
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
I am securing finances this year. Just about EVERY year I transform my credit, pay off bills, dispute things on my credit report that continue to reappear every time the current collection agency sells the account to a new collection agency. YES THAT VISCIOUS CYCLE! It seems like no matter what I do and every time I am "getting ahead" there is always something that holds me back from doing what I need to do. I mean I wanna, yea "wanna" . . not "want to" be in that magic number! And(grammatically incorrect), but hey . .it's my blog (LOL); I ain't talking about that magic number in the gospel song to go up first in the second coming. I'm talking about that GOOD CREDIT MAGIC NUMBER!! I am tired of swaying and NOT getting there!! It's like I'm the damn working upper MIDDLE class poor!! I mean my day job is a government one so I would rather get those wonderful tax cuts that the rich have access to . .have GREAT credit and live the best life they are living; however I am paid in GRATITUDE for my job and I can recognize my own face in the mirror at the end of the day!
Growing up I was taught to work for what you want because nothing is free! Yea . .GREAT CONCEPT; however I was not taught about credit or to save for a rainy day. Hell I made it . .I spent it! Yes I paid bills . . .which by the way took me quite some time to grasp; but I conquered it! Anything that was left after paying bills was a FREE FOR ALL in my mind! YEA . . NO! I never even thought about saving anything for an "emergency" until my husband talked about saving and we argued FOR YEARS, yes YEARS about making sure we had something saved because you never know what might happen. I tried to tell y'all that I made it . .I spent it. Still I struggled over and over again with that concept.
Credit? What is credit? Hell what even does my social security number have to do with credit? My mama said don't give that number out. Now she never did say why? You know you just do whatever your mama, grandmother or whomever the approved matriarch of the family is! Like you don't question anything when you're from the South. It's oh ok . .hell she said it . .it must be right! Then I learned this magical thing . . .OH SNAP . . I can get a credit card to buy anything I want!!!??? Now they failed to tell me about the part where I had to pay it back. Explain what an interest rate was. Explain all the "fees" associated with this magical card. OH and most importantly if I didn't pay it back or it was late . . the balance would damn near double from what I even spent!! YES so crash course on CREDIT . .if you don't have the cash for it . .don't get it!! Again . .that took YEARS for me to learn. I filed Chapter 7 bankruptcy and got a brand new start!! It was so new that I got even more credit cards!! You would think . .ok you got out of this just like you prayed for God to do for you . .annnnnnddddd yea you tried it again! But see this time I had a better handle on things and I understood what I needed to do. NOT! Remember in the beginning I said that finances was in my bag to secure . . yea so years later that's still the case! I mean my credit is better (wink wink) but I am NOT in the magic number!! I want to be in the MAGIC NUMBER!! I am CLAIMING MY TIME!!
I work too hard in MANY jobs in order to live MY BEST DAMN LIFE finally and I am CLAIMING MY TIME!! 2018 is MY TIME!! It wasn't until my marriage dissipated that I LEARNED to save for an emergency and to juggle everything on my own. I was forced to learn and I mastered that whole moving from two incomes to one income and maintaining the lifestyle I am accustomed to!! Hell I needed my Caribou! My friends that know me actually gave me money for Caribou!! YES I LOVE YOU LADIES!!! Yennafer Jttrevold, Carcia Mooper, Bmy Arthles, Nenny Pelson. Names have been changed to protect identities . .LOL! I mean I am accustomed to the debt I have acquired!!
I asked earlier WHAT IS IN YOUR BAG? You have to figure that out so that you too are able to SECURE IT! I am CLAIMING MY TIME and YOU ARE TOO!! Don't over pack your bag and have realistic expectations. If it's financial, unless you come into some NICE MONEY . .don't forget about me . . you are not going to be able to secure your bag financially in one swoop. There's a process so take your time and do what's necessary. All I ask is that you send checks directly to my debtors. I don't even need the cash . .that's how serious I am about CLAIMING MY TIME!! Whatever is in your bag . . .2018 is the year of CLAIMING MY TIME!!
Be Blessed!
LR Wilson, Founder
IG: @channelingtequila
FB: Channing Tequila
Follow on Google+
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
Friday, December 29, 2017
Shaken Not Stirred
So I'm just going to say what people are thinking because lets face it . .it's the reality of things! Some people are just petty and petty irritates the hell out of me. For instance, we are currently living in a world where everyone is out for themselves and have no concern about the ramifications of their actions on other people. Now although petty irritates me . . I can be petty as well when pushed; however petty is NOT my thing. Often times people are more reactive than proactive and that's what complicates relationships . .ALL RELATIONSHIPS! Now lets define "relationship" for those who only can relate a relationship in a romantic sense. Like how I used "relate" and "relationship"?? I know . .genius right? LOL . .not at all!
Back to the definition of relationship. Webster defines it as . ."the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected" (www.merriam-webster.com). Some very key words in this definition, I must say! Let's point them out . . "two or more concepts", "objects", "people are connected", "state of being connected" . . .see I knew you could do it! Yea . .it's the whole damn definition that tells us what a relationship pertains to. It's not just a group of people, it's not just a "race" of people or even assigned to just a romantic partnership. A relationship is a myriad of things that are "connected". When there is a disconnect . . guess what?? There is a breakdown in that relationship. I would even go a bit further and add the relationship with YOURSELF is highly important to understand and when that's disconnected Houston we have a problem!
I can honestly say that I never really thought of the relationship with myself as being a relationship at all. I went about my daily life being a wife, a mom, a daughter, a sister, a friend, etc. all in an effort to make sure I had good relationships with everyone, but myself. I didn't realize how important that ONE relationship was in order to be complete. All these years I thought that being complete was making sure everyone else was happy. I was "happy" going from day to day making sure that those relationships were in tact and neglecting my own happiness. Sad thing is . .I didn't even know I wasn't happy which happens quite frequently in any relationship you are trying to maintain. Being consumed with and in charge of another person's happiness will often times take you away from the most important relationship of all . . YOUR OWN! Now listen . .I'm not saying to drop everybody and just do you! Although, sometimes you may need to do that to get to YOUR HAPPY; which we will also visit . .but for now we are talking about taking care of your own happiness first in order to be YOUR best in all relationships.
I adopted a phrase in 2017 that has worked out pretty well for me so far. Of course you're dying to know what that is . .so I will just give it to you . .wait no more!! "If it doesn't make me happy, I'm not doing it". Yea that's pretty much it! I mean that one phrase has been enough to change my life completely!! It may even seem a little selfish; however at this point in my life . .I frankly don't give a damn. Some would argue that I've always been selfish in that way; but the truth is . .I haven't been selfish enough because I often put my own happiness on the backburner so that I could please everyone else. This did NOT work out in my life or my relationships. I always "stirred" the pot in the direction of someone else's happiness so that I didn't "shake" up things. Hence . .the title "Shaken Not Stirred"! Another clever one huh? Well I'm here all week folks . .LOL!
I haven't been the best wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend etc. in my efforts to maintain those relationships as much as I thought I was . .if we're being truly honest here . .I just wasn't. I had to find my OWN HAPPINESS in order to be my best in every relationship. I remember when I got my undergrad degree in Criminal Justice . .yesss that will make my life complete and I will be so happy I proclaimed!! I vowed after getting that degree I was done with school. I would save the world and be in my HAPPY PLACE! Well . .it sure did . .for about 60 days!! Microwave happiness is what I called it! It was hot . .it was fast and it was instant happiness. So instant that I was bored as hell and needed something else to do!! I went and enrolled in a Master's program thinking YESSS this will make me happy for a long time!! Again . .I will save the world with this degree because obviously this is what I need to make me happy and everyone involved in a relationship with me so that's what I will do! I had relationships that lapsed and/or suffered because I was putting all my time into this degree while continuing to work a full time job, attempting to maintain the household, running to sporting events for my kids to make sure I was supporting them in their own happiness; yet and still this wasn't enough although I THOUGHT it was. Whew . . getting that degree, maintaining relationships and my sanity was a juggle!! I was Shaken and Stirred!!
It took a few steps to get to MY HAPPY. So in building a better relationship with YOU and MYSELF, I will share what I have learned. The process is ongoing and it may be different for each of you. You will continue to learn more about yourself as you go along and that's the REAL key to YOUR HAPPY. In order to get to YOUR HAPPY, you have to be able to be a little bit selfish. Not to the point of relational demise; however there are a few steps you must take in order to get to YOUR HAPPY. Let us count them now!
1) Acknowledge you are NOT HAPPY in your current state
2) Define what HAPPINESS really means to YOU and not others
3) Start the process, whatever that may be, to get to YOUR HAPPY (baby steps)
4) Don't allow someone else to determine YOUR state of HAPPY
5) Don't be petty!
I am not going to lie . .putting your own happiness first will be VERY HARD in the beginning because you are so use to making sure everyone else's happiness is in tact. It felt weird for me and it took a lot of prayer, therapy and HONEST self reflection to get to this place. YES black people go to therapy!! It's like this new thing to keep your damn sanity! I had to actually acknowledge some things that I didn't want to face in order to get to MY HAPPY! I cried many days and nights . .trying to figure things out and I had no clue where to begin. The reality was and still is, I needed to be HONEST with where I was in life and what I wanted to accomplish not just professionally but intimately in the one relationship that allowed me to EVOLVE . . my relationship with myself. I was SHAKEN NOT STIRRED . .finally!! I had to shake things up in my OWN LIFE and take a different route in order to NOT stir things up. YES. . some of my relationships ended because guess what . .I started doing me the right way and not the way others expected. I didn't care about making other people happy any longer which released ALOT OF ANXIETY for me. Without telling y'all all my business . . just yet . .know that I started to LOVE ME MORE INSIDE vs giving an "appearance" on the outside. I was selfish in a bad way in my marriage, with my kids, in my familial relationships and my friendships which made it impossible for me to maintain those relationships at a level that exceeded expectations of loyalty, love and honesty. Do you know why that is? Of course you don't which is why you're reading this blog right now! BAM . .another clever one!!
I didn't love ME enough to sustain those relationships and be selfish in a good way, a healthy way but most importantly in a way that made me GET TO MY HAPPY. I'm not perfect by any means . .hell nowhere even near close to perfect; but at the end of the day I can accept my responsibility in the demise of those relationships and am able to admit that I didn't secure them the way I should have because I was insecure within my self. With that said . . .GET TO YOUR HAPPY. You will have to stir the pot in order to shake things in your favor; but when all is said and done you will prevail because you were SHAKEN NOT STIRRED!
With Love
LR Wilson, Founder
Please follow, comment, share!
IG: @channelingtequila
FB: Channeling Tequila
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
www.channelingtequila.blogspot.com
Back to the definition of relationship. Webster defines it as . ."the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected" (www.merriam-webster.com). Some very key words in this definition, I must say! Let's point them out . . "two or more concepts", "objects", "people are connected", "state of being connected" . . .see I knew you could do it! Yea . .it's the whole damn definition that tells us what a relationship pertains to. It's not just a group of people, it's not just a "race" of people or even assigned to just a romantic partnership. A relationship is a myriad of things that are "connected". When there is a disconnect . . guess what?? There is a breakdown in that relationship. I would even go a bit further and add the relationship with YOURSELF is highly important to understand and when that's disconnected Houston we have a problem!
I can honestly say that I never really thought of the relationship with myself as being a relationship at all. I went about my daily life being a wife, a mom, a daughter, a sister, a friend, etc. all in an effort to make sure I had good relationships with everyone, but myself. I didn't realize how important that ONE relationship was in order to be complete. All these years I thought that being complete was making sure everyone else was happy. I was "happy" going from day to day making sure that those relationships were in tact and neglecting my own happiness. Sad thing is . .I didn't even know I wasn't happy which happens quite frequently in any relationship you are trying to maintain. Being consumed with and in charge of another person's happiness will often times take you away from the most important relationship of all . . YOUR OWN! Now listen . .I'm not saying to drop everybody and just do you! Although, sometimes you may need to do that to get to YOUR HAPPY; which we will also visit . .but for now we are talking about taking care of your own happiness first in order to be YOUR best in all relationships.
I adopted a phrase in 2017 that has worked out pretty well for me so far. Of course you're dying to know what that is . .so I will just give it to you . .wait no more!! "If it doesn't make me happy, I'm not doing it". Yea that's pretty much it! I mean that one phrase has been enough to change my life completely!! It may even seem a little selfish; however at this point in my life . .I frankly don't give a damn. Some would argue that I've always been selfish in that way; but the truth is . .I haven't been selfish enough because I often put my own happiness on the backburner so that I could please everyone else. This did NOT work out in my life or my relationships. I always "stirred" the pot in the direction of someone else's happiness so that I didn't "shake" up things. Hence . .the title "Shaken Not Stirred"! Another clever one huh? Well I'm here all week folks . .LOL!
I haven't been the best wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend etc. in my efforts to maintain those relationships as much as I thought I was . .if we're being truly honest here . .I just wasn't. I had to find my OWN HAPPINESS in order to be my best in every relationship. I remember when I got my undergrad degree in Criminal Justice . .yesss that will make my life complete and I will be so happy I proclaimed!! I vowed after getting that degree I was done with school. I would save the world and be in my HAPPY PLACE! Well . .it sure did . .for about 60 days!! Microwave happiness is what I called it! It was hot . .it was fast and it was instant happiness. So instant that I was bored as hell and needed something else to do!! I went and enrolled in a Master's program thinking YESSS this will make me happy for a long time!! Again . .I will save the world with this degree because obviously this is what I need to make me happy and everyone involved in a relationship with me so that's what I will do! I had relationships that lapsed and/or suffered because I was putting all my time into this degree while continuing to work a full time job, attempting to maintain the household, running to sporting events for my kids to make sure I was supporting them in their own happiness; yet and still this wasn't enough although I THOUGHT it was. Whew . . getting that degree, maintaining relationships and my sanity was a juggle!! I was Shaken and Stirred!!
It took a few steps to get to MY HAPPY. So in building a better relationship with YOU and MYSELF, I will share what I have learned. The process is ongoing and it may be different for each of you. You will continue to learn more about yourself as you go along and that's the REAL key to YOUR HAPPY. In order to get to YOUR HAPPY, you have to be able to be a little bit selfish. Not to the point of relational demise; however there are a few steps you must take in order to get to YOUR HAPPY. Let us count them now!
1) Acknowledge you are NOT HAPPY in your current state
2) Define what HAPPINESS really means to YOU and not others
3) Start the process, whatever that may be, to get to YOUR HAPPY (baby steps)
4) Don't allow someone else to determine YOUR state of HAPPY
5) Don't be petty!
I am not going to lie . .putting your own happiness first will be VERY HARD in the beginning because you are so use to making sure everyone else's happiness is in tact. It felt weird for me and it took a lot of prayer, therapy and HONEST self reflection to get to this place. YES black people go to therapy!! It's like this new thing to keep your damn sanity! I had to actually acknowledge some things that I didn't want to face in order to get to MY HAPPY! I cried many days and nights . .trying to figure things out and I had no clue where to begin. The reality was and still is, I needed to be HONEST with where I was in life and what I wanted to accomplish not just professionally but intimately in the one relationship that allowed me to EVOLVE . . my relationship with myself. I was SHAKEN NOT STIRRED . .finally!! I had to shake things up in my OWN LIFE and take a different route in order to NOT stir things up. YES. . some of my relationships ended because guess what . .I started doing me the right way and not the way others expected. I didn't care about making other people happy any longer which released ALOT OF ANXIETY for me. Without telling y'all all my business . . just yet . .know that I started to LOVE ME MORE INSIDE vs giving an "appearance" on the outside. I was selfish in a bad way in my marriage, with my kids, in my familial relationships and my friendships which made it impossible for me to maintain those relationships at a level that exceeded expectations of loyalty, love and honesty. Do you know why that is? Of course you don't which is why you're reading this blog right now! BAM . .another clever one!!
I didn't love ME enough to sustain those relationships and be selfish in a good way, a healthy way but most importantly in a way that made me GET TO MY HAPPY. I'm not perfect by any means . .hell nowhere even near close to perfect; but at the end of the day I can accept my responsibility in the demise of those relationships and am able to admit that I didn't secure them the way I should have because I was insecure within my self. With that said . . .GET TO YOUR HAPPY. You will have to stir the pot in order to shake things in your favor; but when all is said and done you will prevail because you were SHAKEN NOT STIRRED!
With Love
LR Wilson, Founder
Please follow, comment, share!
IG: @channelingtequila
FB: Channeling Tequila
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
www.channelingtequila.blogspot.com
Friday, December 22, 2017
What's In A Name?
Channeling Tequila??? Why in the world did you choose that name? Oh, because you LOVE tequila! Welllll . . .since you did ask, yes I do LOVE tequila especially and emphatically Patron; however that is not why I chose the name for my blog series. This blog idea has been sitting and fermenting for some time until one day I decided this is the day. I've been directed to do this for so long; yet and still I kept talking about doing it...but faith without works is dead! I was struggling with naming the blog because I needed it to 1) get attention, 2) not be too overwhelming and 3) definitely not be confined to a particular audience or subject matter. I'm a Leo so I need to roam in order to be at peace in everything I do.
On my personal Facebook page, I shared a post that read "stop trying to make everybody happy. you're not tequila"courtesy of Purple Clover. This resonated with me because indeed my temporary happy occurs when I'm drinking Patron tequila. I don't care what's going on in my life . .give me some Patron tequila and I am instantly in chill-mode . . no worries . . no fears . . complete and utter temporary happiness . .LOL! Anyone that has been in my presence while I'm drinking Patron can vouch for my demeanor of complete chill!
By now you're saying...sooooo are you going to tell us how you came up with Channeling Tequila because it really sounds like it's because you love Patron tequila??!! Hold on...I'm getting there!! As I was going to say before I was interrupted with your impatience in my mind...I was walking to coffee with my sister-friend Marcia and discussing my blog name problem. She mentioned my Facebook post from that morning and how Patron tequila does make me happy when nothing else will so what about "Channeling Tequila"? "I like that", I said. Well then she retracted and said, "no wait that doesn't go with your spiritual side". "Why not" I asked. She said, "I don't know." As we continued to walk back to the office, I kept thinking about it over and over again. The more I thought about it, the more it fit me perfectly!!
My spirituality has nothing to do with the title of a blog. The message I am delivering is what's important to me. This blog will talk about a lot of things . .everyday life things . .things that will make you channel YOUR HAPPY which just happens to be Patron tequila for me at times . .LOL! Whatever YOUR HAPPY is . .we will be channeling just that! You are in charge of your own HAPPINESS and no one else walking on this earth has the ability to give you that. Now that you know the FULL STORY behind the name . . .I invite you to buckle your seatbelts. . .put on your helmets and push the throttle to the floor because we are about to take off! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT! YOU matter!!
Channeling Tequila!
Follow me on IG: @channelingtequila
Facebook: Channeling Tequila
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
#subscribe #support #share #yourhappy
Be Blessed!
LR Wilson, Founder
On my personal Facebook page, I shared a post that read "stop trying to make everybody happy. you're not tequila"courtesy of Purple Clover. This resonated with me because indeed my temporary happy occurs when I'm drinking Patron tequila. I don't care what's going on in my life . .give me some Patron tequila and I am instantly in chill-mode . . no worries . . no fears . . complete and utter temporary happiness . .LOL! Anyone that has been in my presence while I'm drinking Patron can vouch for my demeanor of complete chill!
By now you're saying...sooooo are you going to tell us how you came up with Channeling Tequila because it really sounds like it's because you love Patron tequila??!! Hold on...I'm getting there!! As I was going to say before I was interrupted with your impatience in my mind...I was walking to coffee with my sister-friend Marcia and discussing my blog name problem. She mentioned my Facebook post from that morning and how Patron tequila does make me happy when nothing else will so what about "Channeling Tequila"? "I like that", I said. Well then she retracted and said, "no wait that doesn't go with your spiritual side". "Why not" I asked. She said, "I don't know." As we continued to walk back to the office, I kept thinking about it over and over again. The more I thought about it, the more it fit me perfectly!!
My spirituality has nothing to do with the title of a blog. The message I am delivering is what's important to me. This blog will talk about a lot of things . .everyday life things . .things that will make you channel YOUR HAPPY which just happens to be Patron tequila for me at times . .LOL! Whatever YOUR HAPPY is . .we will be channeling just that! You are in charge of your own HAPPINESS and no one else walking on this earth has the ability to give you that. Now that you know the FULL STORY behind the name . . .I invite you to buckle your seatbelts. . .put on your helmets and push the throttle to the floor because we are about to take off! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT! YOU matter!!
Channeling Tequila!
Follow me on IG: @channelingtequila
Facebook: Channeling Tequila
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com
#subscribe #support #share #yourhappy
Be Blessed!
LR Wilson, Founder
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