Often times in life we go through things and we do not understand why! In the moment, we definitely are not reflecting on what the outcome will be because we are "in the moment"! Ironically enough for this piece, I was reading the devotional reading for today and the title is "You're Not Stuck - You're Going Through". We, well I didn't, look at that as a positive. The positive is you are moving through things and not remaining stagnant. That's a WONDERFUL THING! Yea it took me this long and that devotional reading to actually show me it's a good thing to be going through!
Going through my relationship drama I was branded. Branded as the person who did everything to destroy the marriage. True enough, I played a part; however I was not alone. I can only discuss, as I have said time and time again . .my truth . . so that's what I will claim . .my truth! It amazed me that so many other people knew so much more about me than I knew about myself. Not just "people" but people who don't even know me had so much to say about what I was branded as to them. At one point I asked, my then husband, if those people were there with me when I was doing whatever they said I was doing?! I was really confused about my branding when they didn't even know me. Well lo and behold, a lot of jibber jabber was going on about what they heard. We all know how the game telephone is played. My thing is and always have been if you want to know something about me .. ask me. I will then decide whether or not I want to answer your questions. It's my right!
Bonded . . now this one is quite lovely I must say. Recently I went on a girls trip with eight other beautiful, black, educated, fun females to Mexico. There were nine of us total and six were Delta Sigma Theta . . my dream soro! When I tell you there is no bond like the sisterhood that they have . .that I have witnessed . .it's real. We had moments of reflection and complete vulnerability discussing our lives, challenges, past events, current events that have made and molded us into the women we are today. It was a time of bonding that was so needed for many of us there. Yes the trip was fun; however that moment of bonding time was essential, needed and accepted. We came from different parts of the USA, different backgrounds, different educational statuses, different income statuses but at the end of the day we were all on a leveled playing field as we bonded.
When you are going through your moments in life be ready to be BRANDED & BONDED! You will be branded by what others have seen, said or heard about you. It's up to you to make sure your brand is true . . should you so desire. It truly is a choice . .YOUR CHOICE to clarify anything you want to be clarified . .or not! You can leave it as well. Just like I did. Find you a group or a person to bond with in your time of trials. Sometimes you don't want to be bothered with people . .and Lord knows I get that . . so find something you can bond with to get yourself centered and ready to move forward. For me it's my poetry!!! I've learned that not everyone is fit to be in my circle and it's ok. Although I try to be a friend to everyone and help everyone . . it's not healthy for me and I have moved to a selfish lifestyle. If it doesn't work for me . . .then it ain't happening! End of story!
One of the most important things I have learned in therapy that I often recite 1) is it kind? 2) is it true? and 3) is it necessary? If you can answer all three of these questions without a doubt . . .you are on your way to freedom! You have #foundYOURhappy
When the brands come flying what will be your response? Are you equipped to withstand them? Will you retaliate? What is your bonding moment, person or people? Be sure to put something in place so that you too can continue to live your #bestlifegoals!
#findyourhappy
With Love,
LR WILSON, Founder
FB: Channeling Tequila
IG: @channelingtequila
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