Friends . . how many of us have them? Friends . .ones you can depend on. That was a popular song by Whodini in 1984. Yea I'm aging myself, but we all know I don't care about that one bit LOL! Anyhow . .that song came to mind when I was being fed the topic for today's blog post. I began to think about how many friends . .not acquaintances, because there is a difference . .that I have had throughout my lifetime. I've had friends for over 30+ years and I have had friends for less time as well. What constitutes a friendship by definition is "the emotion or conduct of friends; the state of being friends; a relationship of being friends; a state of mutual support between allied nations" (dictionary.com). All those textbook definitions have one commonality . . FRIENDS. Many say and even portray they are your friends when you are going through tough times; however the actions that are displayed when you're going through them do not merit a true friendship. I have had so called friends 1) tell my business to others 2) talk about me with those people 3) believe whatever was told to them by other people instead of coming to ask me directly and 4) just drop off without me not knowing what the hell was going on. I use to find myself compromising or asking myself what I could have done in order for those things not to happen in a "friendship" when in reality they were not my friends . .the were foes. Foes swoop in and pretend to care while plotting for your downfall in anyway possible. To me they are just like sleeper cells. . .sitting and waiting until the right time to take you out. Could be years!
True friends listen, give advice if needed, support you, don't tell your business outside of the circle of friends that you've confided in and they most definitely don't disappear. Most importantly a true friend will call you on your shit whether you like it or not because they want what's best for you. It's up to you to listen or not; because their job is done. I have never been one to just act like the damn elephant isn't sitting on our laps at the table, so I call it like it is. I was once told "you keep it too real; that's why people don't like you." Well que sera sera! I enjoy looking at the one face I see in the mirror each day. My mother had to continually come to my school because I was in trouble for my mouth! She said why can't you just sit down and be quiet like everyone else? Yea that doesn't work for me LOL! I have learned over the years what being a true friend is and I have also learned that everybody does not deserve the title of friend. Some will FOREVER stay in the acquaintance status and that's okay. You may be perceived as their friend; however it does not have to be a mutual relationship. Just because you have fulfilled the duty of being a friend to their specification doesn't mean they have done the same for you. Friends come in waves and in seasons. Every friendship is not meant to last through your lifetime. They have come in . .served their purpose in that season . .moved on. It's equivalent to the circle of life!
No lets talk about the Saints. I use to be heavily involved in church for many many years. When I was with my paternal grandmother I went to Catholic church. When I was with my maternal grandmother I went to Baptist church. When I was home with my mother I went to Presbyterian church. When I became an adult I reverted back to the Baptist church and then to Church Of God In Christ (COGIC) church. So I'm pretty well rounded in the department of "religion". My gripe is that no matter what church or denomination I was involved, the Saints were involved in worldly drama. YES I am aware that the church is only a building and the people in the church make up that "church". I put no man or woman on a religious pedestal because we all are human and make mistakes. That's not my issue. I know you're like well what the hell is the issue then . .or at least I would be lol! The issue is when the Saints act as if they have never done anything wrong and don't acknowledge that they were once sinners . .and still do . .yet look down upon others in the same or similar predicament. Yep . .I said it and I said it here. The last time I attended church was about a year or so ago. I attended a church service that had a famous TV judge at church on the day I attended. I go for one reason so I had no idea this was happening that day. The church was CROWDED . .you know like on Easter Sunday when the holiday patrons attend. There was no room inside or upstairs in the balcony so we sat outside in the atrium. You would think that if this service was so important there would be accommodations for everyone to hear the service and potentially see what was going on inside the sanctuary . .there wasn't. The doors were not opened for us in the atrium and there was no screen to view what was going on. I sat there for about fifteen minutes when I noticed a young family of seven enter through the doors. Father, mother and five small children came in and were first time visitors. If you know anything about your spiritual self you can read when someone is in need of the Word and this family was in need. They tried to get into the sanctuary and was not permitted to do so. They ultimately came out and sat in the atrium across from us. I watched as they appeared to be troubled and needed to be in the sanctuary to be fed the Word. It didn't happen . . .they got frustrated and left. I often think about them and pray that they received whatever it is they were seeking on that day because the Saints were not there to assist them to get whatever it was they were in search of. I was so disgusted that the service was NOT a service for those seeking spiritual help but for a show in my opinion. I left that day and didn't return. I was asked why I haven't been there by others and I explained how that one incident hurt me so badly. I did not want to be associated with that type of environment. Later I learned that the SAINTS were not playing well together and alot of behind the scenes drama happened which spilled over into the church and there was a great divide. Always listen to your inner soul. It will not steer you in the wrong direction. I may or may not become active in a church setting again; however I am fully aware of my needs spiritually. I'm not a Bible thumper as they say . .but I do know, believe and try to practice the Word. I do what's right by people.
The thing you ALL have been waiting on is the segment on H*es! Yes I'm about to talk about this today too. I was in discussion with some guys and they were talking about females being hoes because they sleep around. My question was why are they hoes and men aren't when they do the same thing? You would have thought I asked them to solve the equation to World Peace!! One guy said "that's just nasty for a female to do that". I asked why is it nasty? All he could say is "it just is". Well I need to know why. These are consenting adults so why is she nasty and he's not? Why does he get a pass and a pat on the back when she receives ridicule? No one could answer that question so I went ahead and broke it down for them. Any time a woman does anything that a man can do without question is a problem because men feel like they are superior and untouchable. It's a new day baby so unless you are on board with "adulting" you will be left behind in your caveman thinking. As long as a woman is respectful in doing what she does, there shouldn't be an issue with her sleeping with as many as she chooses . . just like a man. Men can be hoes too so stop acting like men get a medal of honor for being a hoe and women get shunned. It's a double standard and always has been which is exactly why the playing field is being leveled now. Don't do what you wouldn't want the next person doing if it's a problem. Ladies respect yourself and do what you want when you want. WE ALL GROWN so act like it. Self love is the ultimate conclusion. Love you doing you!
#findyourhappy
With Love,
LR WILSON, Founder
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