Settling Went Out with The Trash!

Many of us have experienced heartache and disappointment in relationships. If you've never had this to happen, you are definitely an anomaly! I wouldn't wish that pain on my worst enemy. We tend to lose ourselves in the desire to be loved and to have love all at the same time settling just to say we "have somebody" when in reality we truly do not.

I've had my share of heartaches and pains as well as employed those same things onto others. Once I realized that I'm no longer settling just to have someone and that I love me more than anyone ever could, I knew then that I was done with games. Sometimes we long for something so badly that we can't see past the smoke and mirrors to see the real situation at hand.

Sis...you don't have to settle. You are loved and worth being loved by the right person. You won't have to share and you definitely won't have to prove your love by accepting bullshit. I get it...lonely is no fun. If I had to weigh my options..I'm choosing lonely over tears of heartache. I've accepted the fact that not everyone is ready for me and I'm damn sure not accepting everyone. 

Although I still love my ex, I am no longer accepting bullshit as the main course. Digesting extra drama upsets my palate so I'll sit alone and starve. The older I get the less tolerate of bullshit I am. I find myself often times reverting back to "proving" I am worthy of love and that my change has been for the better. Then I'm reminded that I don't need to prove myself to anyone. I am who I am...take it or leave it. Either way we both learn a lesson.

Anybody can be faithful...if they want to. I know this is breaking news but yes IT'S YOUR CHOICE! You can't make anyone change their behavior. Just like you can't make them love you the way you want to be loved. On the flip side, if you've never had a conversation about how you want to be loved and vice versa, you can't expect them to understand. Now listen

..if you've had that conversation and the same behavior is there, I'll go ahead and let you know they don't care...that's the hard truth. 

None of us are free from sin, yet we do have a voice in how or if we act on it. Waiting, hoping and wishing someone will change is only helping you to miss out on what/who is already ready for you. Settling went out with the trash. If you don't do nothing else after reading this post...LOVE YOU MORE. 

#findyourhappy 

With Love,

LR WILSON, FOUNDER 

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The Rant!

Things that irritate the hell out of me is selective memory and downright denial. It never ceases to amaze me that some people tend to have selective memory about what they did to a person and then there's complete denial. I'm very transparent and I've not ways been this way for fear of judgment. Then I had to realize that the only way I can get to the healing I needed was to just put it out there...own it and learn from it.

The worst thing you can do to a person is deny your part in the demise of a situation. That selective memory shit kills me. Yes..today I am venting differently and in real time. Not everyone is at a point in their lives where they accept responsibility and I get that because I've been there. Now at some point there should've been a time when you at least reflected on your role in the situation. Maybe it's just me but I wholeheartedly know that is the key to healing.

"Hurt people hurt other people" is an excuse to continue the behavior. I know all the sociology and psychology peeps heads are spinning right now. I said it and I stand by it. Because you were hurt would signify to me that you don't want anyone else to feel that type of pain. Please understand that I too have been the perpetrator of pain. Again...this is just me. There are so many undiagnosed people running around trying to self medicate by spewing trauma on others that they never dealt with or don't acknowledge.

Please get your toxic asses away from me if you're not ready to accept what is and make it better. Not just for yourself but for others involved. It's selfish to want other people to treat you a certain way, yet you're not willing to do the same. Do everyone a favor and get you some prayer and some therapy. It's life changing once you get the right one!

So with all of that said...be kind...be mindful and be healed. #findyourhappy

With Love,

LR WILSON, FOUNDER
FB: CHANNELING TEQUILA PAGE
IG: @CHANNELINGTEQUILA
WEB: CHANNELINGTEQUILA.BLOGSPOT.COM
EMAIL: CHANNELINGTEQUILA@GMAIL.COM 

Exit Stage Right!

If you've ever watched Snagglepuss cartoon (I'm telling my age!); whenever he exited the studio he would say Exit Stage Left! Oh the memories of Saturday morning cartoons as a kid. Well this saying was very famous for quite some time anytime you got ready to leave in a hurry or you were done with whatever it is you were into. Moving right along into the topic of discussion today Exit Stage Right...and what that means.

See whenever I'm done with a discussion matter, I have learned to say what I need to say. Allow the other person to say whatever it is they need to say with back and forth conversing. Whether that's face to face...text...email...messenger or whatever. Now when you go back to beating a dead horse until death itself is dead on the subject matter...I will promptly end my participation in the conversation by making the other person aware that I'm done with the conversation. Sooooo Exit Stage Right...out of my thought process!

It behooves me how you can have a conversation and for some odd reason it circles back to the very same topic it began with...and has been addressed. This is my pet peeve when conversing. If I say I'm done with the conversation and the person I'm speaking to says they're not done. Uhhhh....continue on if you like but just know that I will not be entertaining a continued conversation on that topic. Exit Stage Right!

I have learned that those conversations, if I allow them to continue, drain my energy. Dampens my WHOLE soul. These past few years I have fully embraced my mental stability and protecting my energy. Some people just like to beat death out of death just to have something to say. I'm a firm believer that the past is the past...the present is the now so live in it and the future is to come so prepare for it. I've put in alot of "self work" to get to this place.

People who don't embrace the person you are becoming and continually allow themselves to reference the old you...enjoy staying in the past. It's easy because it's territory they are familiar with. Change is hard for everyone. The person going through the change and for the people who won't allow you to change because it's uncomfortable for them to accept. Exit Stage Right!

I don't give a damn if it takes you the rest of your life to change into who you want to be before you leave this earth...take your time...do it right and embrace every time you transform. Change is fluid. No one changes all at once and each time is different because you acquire knowledge to help your growth. I've been told I change so much people don't know who I am. My response is GREAT! I'm always trying to be better than the old me! The next time you're faced with death beating the hell out of the dead...Exit Stage Right to protect your energy! #findyourhappy

With Love,

LR WILSON, FOUNDER

FB: Channeling Tequila Page
IG: @channelingtequila
Web: channelingtequila.blogspot.com
Email: channelingtequila@gmail.com

And You Thought I Was Insecure?

As I blast Insecure by Jazmine Sullivan and Bryson Tiller

🎶Why you gotta' be so insecure? (So insecure, yeah)
When I did all I could do, but you be wanting more
(But you be wanting more and more and more and more and more and more)
And why you can't get up off my back?
And I can take a lot of shit, but I won't take that (but I won't take that)
No, I won't take that no more🎶

So this week was the week I actually saw my very first plus model picture in print! The 2020 Worth My Weight in Gold - Plus Size Fine calendar was released. Well I got mine is the real story. But that's neither here nor there lol! The point of this part of the story is that I was in it. I've taken many pictures but this one, done by a professional photographer...hairstylist...make up artist...I mean this was the shit! Or so I believed!

Me being me...super excited about it...asked a male counterpart if he wanted to be the first to see it with me. I mean he was sitting right there so why not? He declined..for whatever reason. Well for a reason I didn't grasp at the moment. So I opened the package and flipped the calendar seeing all the lovely plus models whom I had built a sisterhood with. They were phenomenal!! Then I get to my month. I bet you wanna know which one huh? Here's a hint....it's one of my favorite holidays of the two!! So if you know me...you can figure it out. Anyway...back to the story. I saw ME!!! ME IN PRINT!! ME DOING THE DAMN THANG! It was such a surreal moment and I loved every minute of it.

Fast forward about 40 minutes or so after the unveiling. I get a call from the male that I asked about sharing this moment with. Wellllll I'm just here to tell you the excitement that I had was NOT there. Instead it came with ridicule, body shaming and pretty much whatever else you can say to depleat my excitement. Most importantly of all the things that I saw in the picture as beautiful, artistic and phenomenal were seen as negative and a tunnel vision of negativity. Obviously I lashed out and defended my work and the beauty of it. I celebrate ME! No one...absolutely no one saw the same things he saw. And here's why...

An insecure person within themselves will always try to make you feel insecure about your securities. Guess what...that has nothing to do with you. I'm VERY secure with myself and the decisions I make in MY LIFE. Never be afraid to own the things that make you happy. You only have one life so ride that bitch until the wheels fall off. RUN TELL THAT! I've said time and time again that everybody is not cheering for you. They would rather you sit in the back of the bus quietly and speak when spoken to.

Wellllll...my mama should've told him and others that I am NOT THE QUIET TYPE! The old me would've been crying and taking those things that were said to heart. I would've been second guessing the beautiful art that I was able to display of someone else's vision because that's the girl that loved and lived to please others. Keep my being uncomfortable comfortable for them. Yeaaa see she left and will not be back.

Two things I know for sure don't mix...oil and water...a Leo woman and an insecure man. I'm bold and I'm me. I take chances and I take risks. Some that I had to learn hard lessons but most I've loved. And you thought I was insecure?

Please take several seats as one of my good sister friends would say. I promptly added...outside the stadium! At the end of the day...take that picture...love that decision....hell love you! And you thought I was insecure? #findyourhappy

With Love,

LR WILSON, FOUNDER
FB: CHANNELING TEQUILA PAGE
IG: @CHANNELINGTEQUILA
WEB: CHANNELINGTEQUILA.BLOGSPOT.COM
EMAIL: CHANNELINGTEQUILA@GMAIL.COM